Is blood thicker than water? – By Simphiwe Mandla Malunga

It was midweek in the afternoon as I was following my daily routine at the school residence, right on the spot my emotions were triggered.

Their absence took the same years as my age and lately they decided to reach out to me. I became inquisitive immediately when she mentioned my mother’s name, after she had consistently asked me about my roots which are foreign to me.

At age twenty (20) the young lady whom had long searched for her brother had finally found him through Facebook, a social network. As I answered enthusiastically every question that the young lady posed to me deep down I knew this was my paternal sister. I was familiar to the saga that my biological father was a polygamist and a traditional healer which he still is. The little sister who caught me by surprise when she confirmed that indeed we were siblings amazed me when she said, ‘‘our father once mentioned that he has a total of thirty three (33) children although some have passed on’’.

Since my mother was the only affirmation, all that was left was for me to ask her about my biological father despite the fact that during the course of my questioning I was stirring unhealed wounds as this precious woman like many other strong women had raised me into becoming the man that I am today without ‘‘my father’s’’ presence. I abstractly terminated contact to this little sister for some time whom I recently found as I figured that she would try creating some contact between me and my ‘‘father’’.  Heavens help me! Like most children would be thrilled into finding out that their biological fathers were still alive and they had siblings out there, I wish that was the case too in my life instead I found it hard to be cheerful.

Harsh as it may sound I honestly wish things could go back to normal, me knowing that I have a father out there who just isn’t keen on standing up to his responsibilities. Some say there’s always two sides of the story, in my case ‘‘my father’’ could have already showed attempts of reaching out and calling my cellular phone by now as months have passed by since he has been in possession of my contact numbers according to my paternal sister. So, what would be the reason of him not calling? Could it be that he lacks bravery?  Could it be that he is not in possession of my contact details? Only the pot knows how hot the fire is.

To all men out there, stand up to your responsibilities and avail yourselves to your own children and for the chosen few that live up to their responsibilities HATS OFF. I plead to all men that they ought not to plant seeds in every part of the earth and in turn flee as if those seeds did not belong to them. Are children still regarded as being blessings despite the absence of their fathers?

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